Seriously, what the hell is going on with Ali Lohan?

Publish date: 2024-06-15
41829, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - Monday June 21 2010. Lindsay Lohan enjoys a busy night out in Hollywood with her new BFF Eilat Anschel and her younger sister Ali. The three went to Nobu for dinner before Eliat drove Lilo and her sis (back seat) to Teddy's where Sam Ronson was DJing. Photograph: David Tonnessen, PacificCoastNews.com

I was going to write another Lindsay post, this time about how she’s probably going to get the police to temporarily take off her SCRAM bracelet so she can pose nude for her 6126 leggings ads, but as I was looking through our photos of Lindsay, this photo of Ali Lohan popped up. You see, Ali went out sober-crack-clubbing with Lindsay last night, and Ali’s gaunt, tragic face caught one photographer’s eye. Seriously, what is wrong with this girl? And I mean “what’s wrong” in the sense of “is she sick?” rather than “what was she thinking?” Ali is all of 16 years old. What is it about the Lohan women? Once they hit puberty, they all get smoker’s rasps and immediately age to “40-something orange Reno cocktail waitress”. Ali looks crazy ill.

I think many of us who have followed Lindsanity and Lohan family drama have always worried about Ali, but perhaps it took a turn for the worse with Ali’s appearance (with Lindsay) at Millions of Milkshakes in April. Ali had eyebrows of doom, and she just looked like hell. Once again, I’m not saying the girl is ugly, I’m saying she looks unhealthy and deathly. Here’s a photo of Ali, just two months ago:

39925, WEST HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - Monday April 26 2010. Lindsay Lohan (black leahter jacket) takes little sister Ali (silver tunic)along to Millions of Milkshakes to devise their own sweet treats. Having made their drinks, Lindsay was presented with a fake plastic Oscar to mark the occasion. Following the presentation, the ladies swiftly exited to their waiting car, with Lindsay holding hands with a member of the paparazzi. They all climbed into the waiting vehicle (including the paparazzo) and Lindsay, who was recently dropped from her next acting project, was seen kissing the fake Oscar. According to their mother, Dina Lohan, the siblings are set to go to court to keep their father, Michael Lohan, away from them following his recent attempt to stage an intervention. Photograph: Josephine Santos, PacificCoastNews.com 39915, WEST HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - Monday April 26 2010. Lindsay Lohan takes little sister Ali, 16, to Millions of Milkshakes to concoct their own signature milkshakes. Having made their drinks, Lindsay was presented with a fake plastic Oscar to mark the occasion. Following the presentation, the ladies swiftly exited to their waiting car, with Lindsay holding hands with a member of the paparazzi. They all climbed into the waiting vehicle (including the paparazzo) and Lindsay, who was recently dropped from her next acting project, was seen kissing the fake Oscar. According to their mother, Dina Lohan, the siblings are set to go to court to keep their father, Michael Lohan, away from them following his recent attempt to stage an intervention. Photograph: David Tonnessen, PacificCoastNews.com

See? She looked like Maggie Simpson’s baby nemesis on The Simpsons. What’s wrong with Ali? Is she trying out the same drug cocktail, Adderall, vodka and crack, “The Lohan Special”? Does she have an eating disorder? Because I think there’s some malnutrition in play, as well as drugs. So here’s my question – why can’t Ali be taken out of this situation? And by “situation” I mean “her family”. It’s not that I think Lindsay is even the worst influence on Ali – Dina and Michael are probably even worse than Lindsay. So why can’t the prosecutor looking into Lindsay’s case look into whatever the hell is happening with Ali?

Actress Lindsay Lohan and her sister Ali head to a party on June 12, 2010 in Beverly Hills, CA (Photo MIA PICTURES / Meet The Famous) Photo via Newscom 41520, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - Saturday June 12, 2010. Lindsay Lohan and sister Ali at a friends Hollywood Hills home for a party. She drank an energy drink which was also advertised on a truck parked outside the party. Photograph: David Tonnessen, PacificCoastNews.com

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